Great deals at Eden.co.uk / Shop Christian

I have a confession to make. I've succumbed to online shopping for my Christian stuff. But before you gasp at my serious U-turn on what was a firm principle to keep Christian Bookstores open by actually shopping in them, the online shop I use is (as far as I'm aware) Christian and, quite frankly, extremely competitive in price. Boo-yah! to Amazon, evil bookstore killers ;)

Anyway... The website for Eden is incredibly easy to navigate and very communicative. For example, it'll tell you if the item will reach you by Christmas or not, so you can avoid severe pre-Christmas anxiety by knowing before you click the 'check out' button whether your prezzies will arrive on time. Handy. You can also listen to samples of CD tracks. I was totally vegging out to my 30 seconds worth of Taize. What's more, if you spend more than £5 you'll get FREE DELIVERY!! As a valued customer I also just got a voucher for money off my next order. This site is just TOO GOOD!!

But don't be a stranger to the old-fashioned way of shopping for your Christian books either. Christian bookstores not only provide a great variety of books and goods but also have a warm, welcoming feel that acts as the hub of the Christian community between Sundays. Your local Christian bookstores need you too - especially CLC, whose sole aim is to bring the gospel and Christian Literature to remote areas of the world and, as such, relies on the sales of its books to fund its missions. Their staff are missionaries themselves, volunteering their time to keep the overheads to a minimum and the funding for missions at a maximum.

The Christian retail industry in North America has already taken a hit due to the migration of customers away from its doors and into secular stores that offer Christian literature at highly competitive prices alongside mainstream publications. The Christian Retail industry simply cannot compete with this market and has had to diversify in order to make its stores more 'appealing' and profitable. Incorporating cafes or coffee shops into their stores has been one way store-owners in the US and Canada have kept their businesses alive. In many ways they've had little choice since mainstream stores like WAL-MART and Costco started stocking vast quantities of popular books like Purpose Driven Life, Battlefield of the Mind and The Shack for hugely discounted prices - prices that Christian retailers cannot match. Add to that the availability of many titles on internet shopping sites like Amazon and you've got a recipe for the demise of the Christian retail industry.

At one point it looked as though the UK might head down the same road with shops like Tesco doing a similar thing in stocking copies of The Shack at marked-down prices. But this seems to be a one-off. Fortunately for UK Christian retailers the mainstream bookstores carry very few Christian titles, unlike their North American counterparts. However, we are already seeing the detrimental effect of the recession hit certain distributors, such as IBS-STL. The future of Wesley Owen books is hanging in the balance as a result of the financial trouble affecting the owners of STL.

So I reaffirm my plea to you: Shop Christian and keep this industry alive. Make good use of your Christian bookstore and if there isn't one local to you, use Christian internet shops like Eden.co.uk. CLC has an online shop too. Use it or lose it.

Finally, when you're looking for a Christian book pay the going rate for it. When we talk about 'worth' and 'value' our mind immediately connects it with money. But I believe many Christian books have the power to change our lives for the better. In that sense, their worth is beyond the confines of a wallet. Keep that in mind when you wonder whether you could get the book cheaper online at Amazon. Being a 'good steward' of God's resources doesn't always mean shafting the author and retailer in pursuit of the cheaper price. Consumerism and Christianity are not the best partners. Let's not sacrifice our friends for the sake of our wallets.

Found my wings

Feels like I'm officially back in the land of the living. It's strange because nothing's changed in terms of my employment. I'm still at the airfield one day a week, occasionally more when the shifts are available. I'm still getting phone calls from Temp agencies offering me minimum wage call centre jobs or admin assistant jobs or part time jobs, all of which are decent enough but don't exactly provide me with the greatest amount of security. I got an interview for the admin assistant job, did pretty well (I felt) but wasn't offered the position because I was over-qualified. Normally this would hit me pretty hard. After all, there are only so many rejections one can take. I did get a little upset, but picked myself back up again and carried on as normal.

But things feel different now. Not as dark. More energy. One reason I know is that I've felt more at home in the church I now attend. I've also begun doing more youth work again and the inspiration has returned. I'm brimming with ideas once more whereas before I was an empty shell wondering how I did what I did back when my life was fully focused on youth ministry. It feels so good! Is this finally where I'm supposed to be? I'm almost not so bothered by the kind of work I do as a day job now, as long as I have time and energy for the youth work. I guess I have more hope now: hope for the future. I didn't know what to ask God for but I was resisting the words of Jeremiah 29:11-13 because they're so over-used now. I was then shown the words again and, cornered, was asked "do you truly believe this?" I confessed that I did once but now it seemed sort of a cruel tease. I felt bad for no longer believing it and in my desperation cried out for God to restore my hope. He did. Peace was also restored.


Since then I've been happy to roam about the job sections without that weight of gloom, but also with a renewed sense of purpose. Needing something to occupy my time and sensing that perhaps I should do more for missions I looked at the CLC website to see what the latest news was in the Christian retail industry. I've always got a passion for their work and though it's all mission-based and therefore voluntary it's something I feel strongly about. Having rediscovered hope I felt less anxious about giving my time without financial reward. I noticed that my old haunt in Canterbury was looking for staff and wondered if I should commit some time to them once more. So I travelled in today and chatted with my old boss, Paul, and he mentioned that they were ideally looking for full time staff. Full time wasn't going to work, nor was part time this side of Christmas.

But something else he mentioned piqued my interest. A huge need was currently in the warehouse, based in Aylesbury. With the demise of a major distributor of books comes an opportunity for CLC to take on some of the distribution, which means expanding the warehouse. Already they're experiencing a huge increase in demand from both publishers and customers and as such desperately need order pickers and packers. Immediately I knew I could help fill some of this need. Logistically and financially it makes no sense because I'll have no income from this and consequently no way of living. Since I'll have to move nearer the area it would appear to be a ridiculous notion to even contemplate it. And yet, I feel so compelled to offer my services. How do the full time staff do it?? They surely must exist on prayer alone some days. That challenge, in itself, is enough to make me drop everything and go. Alas, my practical side tells me that it's not at all wise, not to mention that I'd miss the youth work I'm now involved in. And deep down I know God loves that I desire to help out, even if it's not His desire that I actually do the thing I'm passionate about (which is, in this case, moving 200 miles west for a job that doesn't pay...)

At the end of the day, as I sit here and take stock of what's been going on over the past year, I'm just thrilled that I've turned a corner and can feel such passion and motivation once more. I've rediscovered my wings. The aircraft is out of the hangar with a shiny new coat of paint and an engine overhaul, ready to get airborne. I had this image in my head last year but never truly realised it. Today I can safely say that it is here. I may not be airborne just yet but everything is starting to come together.

Yay!

Bright Star at Ashford??

YEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHH!!!

FINALLY. Bright Star is showing at Ashford's Cineworld for 5 days as of Friday 20th November. All is forgiven.

Pity I have no money to go and see it (grrrr... car bill). Where's a hot date when you need one.. a knight in shining armour.. a noble gentleman who wishes to woo me by taking me to the cinema..??

Oh Solitude, if I must with thee dwell.....

Another blog

Just a quick announcement to introduce you to another blog I have created that is more about social commentary and less about my own journey.

The last posting I made on this current blog made me realise I needed another blog to vent my social issues etc, plus it also helps me focus my writing a bit more.

So eyesonthesky will continue to have my personal updates, pictures and stuff, whereas rabadash will have more general venting about life and society etc...

I'd be honoured if you followed both! (even if you don't entirely agree with the commentary on the new one..)

Culture, movies and a whole lot of crap

Bored as I am during my days of waiting for responses to job applications I decided to look at the movie listings for our local cinema on the internet, thinking it might make a nice distraction to go and watch a movie. I've been dying to see Bright Star, the period movie about John Keats, one of my favourite poets. Even more so out of rebellion after reading a pretentious review in the Sunday Times Culture Magazine, written by an equally pretentiously named correspondent called Cosmo Landesman who clearly can't separate 21st century (lack of) morals from 19th century manners and decency. Criticism such as "Their kisses are chaste, their conversation reserved" is poor argument for a couple who wouldn't have exactly pulled a tonsil-tennis moment, mostly because, in general, unmarried couples didn't do that back then, not to mention the possibility that Campion (the Director) was trying to achieve an innocence in their relationship. Anyone who has read Keats, particularly his letters, would see a young, passionate poet who was better at crafting words on paper than in person, "whose words are images of thought refin'd" (Oh Solitude); a man who read of love and dreamed in greek mythology but when confronted with the real deal himself, may have found conversation a challenge, unlike the willful, impetuous and, let's be honest, seriously hormonal Romeo and Juliet, who were all about the wedding night. No comparison really. Oh wait. Landesman did compare. Sigh. Therein lies the source of my rebellion. Romeo and Juliet, John and Fanny aren't. And that's the beauty: the former are fictitious, the latter were real people. Cold shower, Cosmo?

But I'm getting ahead of myself here, since I haven't even seen the movie yet. Anyone who questions the sweet tragedy that is John and Fanny's romance is going to push a few buttons with me. The greater tragedy here is, as it turns out, it's only on in selected cinemas, of which the nearest is about a 2 hour drive away. Oh how perfectly philistine my local town is. All these attempts to up the game of what was formerly deemed to be a dump and they can't even show a wonderfully cultural and literary period movie for longer than a week, apparently. The patrons obviously prefer what I consider to be lesser movies such as Saw VI (oh puh-lease... stop flogging a dead horse... was the first one even necessary?!) or Jennifer's Body (horror/comedy? I gave up on those after the first Scream decided to make a super franchise of such rot).

In fact, what is happening to the movie industry? Previously horror movies were generally shown on and around Halloween. Now we seem to have at least 3 different ones being shown at any one time all year round. Come on, people. Do we have to endure Horror as part of mainstream now?! I must sound terribly prejudiced against this one particular genre but I'm of the opinion that the world is horrific enough without the indecency of movie makers exploiting such graphic scenes of violence for general entertainment. Call me old-fashioned...

Actually I prefer to take the french view of such subjects. Sex and nudity is generally celebrated in film, whereas violence and gore is less acceptable and therefore more heavily restricted. Hurrah for the french. Not that I'm a big fan of too much sex and nudity in film either, but it's better than the other. Make love not war and all that...

So there it is. Today's two-cents' worth.

My pictorial weekend

Gotta love my life. Really. I may complain about it going nowhere right now, but if I was to use hot air balloons - my great passion - as a metaphor for my life, it wouldn't go anywhere particularly fast, but just gently and majestically grace the skies, turning heads and drawing great intrigue as it floats overhead. A thing of beauty. Just look at these photos. I took them with my cell phone. The daytime shot of Purple Haze was taken at the airfield where I currently work. This is the view from my office. The night time shot of Muu was taken at the airfield's unofficial fireworks night on Sunday, the day after Purple Haze cruised in for an easy retrieve for the crew. It's our tradition to do a night glow for the aviation community and we were lucky with the weather this year. It looked pretty hit and miss at sunset with the wind strengthening from the northeast - a direction notorious for not slacking off much. But two hours later we were surprised to see the winds ease and the sky clear, so out came the balloons and this was one of the shots. A great evening. A great weekend.
Times like these make me realise how privileged I am to have this unique opportunity right on my doorstep. I've always been interested in aviation and to be able to be a part of something like this is incredible. I may be in debt and have little opportunity to recover it right now but there are moments like this weekend that make life seem so much brighter.

Random nothings

My life seems slower these days. I had hoped to maintain a fast pace since returning from Calgary, ensuring that I don't get dragged into the 'pit' I seemed to wallow in last year. But it's hard to do when you go from a fast running stream to slow flowing molasses. That is the best metaphor that can describe what it is like here. Mostly it is the lack of full time job. I'm doing bits and pieces, and a lot of stuff if you list it, but it doesn't fill a day, nor does it earn much money. I had an interview within a fortnight of coming home. It was unsuccessful. Since then I've applied to, on average, 3 jobs a week. I've registered with several agencies. Job prospects are slim. It is very hard to maintain a positive attitude in this environment. No money, few jobs, big debts, and little chance of upward mobility. Hearing "lack of experience", "applications are at the interview stage already", "unsuccessful at this time" is becoming a daily event. And I'm tired. So very tired. Yet my days are so uneventful. I miss the morning commute. I miss the sense of purpose that a full time job gives me. I'm done with seeking fulfillment in small things. The era of small things was last year. Last year was my wilderness. I returned to Calgary to regain some clarity and I returned home with it. But where has it gone? Life seems to send me round in circles. Am I growing here? A wise person once told me not to remain in a place where I wasn't growing, even if that meant being away from a place of comfort. I thought I left that place behind when I left Canada. But I'm not growing here either. Growing fatter, maybe. I seem to have returned to the same place I left in June. I thought I'd returned a changed person. But I have come full circle and again the dredge and grind of my lesser existence here has overcome me.

And still I hear of bankers getting huge bonuses, living a reality that is so far removed from mine and 95% of the world. I watch footballers who play maybe 2 or 3 games a week earning more per game than I could ever imagine earning in 10 years. I hear musicians sing songs that have such offensive, uninspiring lyrics, but because it has a good beat and/or melody, or because the person singing/rapping/yelling released a good song in the past, the song becomes hugely popular and makes them another rich, iconic person to add to the multitudinous celebrities we all need more of... I see mainstream newspapers that read more like commentary and opinion than report, presuming the nation agrees with their biased discourse. It's an assumption that has made Britain an ugly place to live, where it is acceptable to publicly scorn Christianity and yet grossly racist to publicly scorn the beliefs of other religions. Just because Britain's era of "Christendom" has passed does not mean that you have leave to openly rebuke it. How quickly do you forget your heritage, oh England. You may not embrace it, but it is who you are.

When I hear the words of a popular Robbie Williams song, "Bodies", singing "Jesus didn't die for you, what are you on" over the radio many times a day I realise this country no longer welcomes me as its own. Who can stand such insult? And when I read a columnist from the Daily Telegraph take cheap shots at a major figure in the world of Christian song writing for the sake of a quick laugh, I see that Britain is no longer Great. I feel no patriotism when I see the cross of St George because the significance of that symbol has faded, much like the concept of Christendom itself. And yet the sacrifice referred to in that cross is being lived out on a daily basis by our troops serving abroad. Do they serve for Queen and country? For the flag? For the liberty of mankind? Their presence in the Middle East, while initially for noble causes, is now the reason our country's security is under such threat. That said, I support them in their endeavours.

But, alas, my passport may be British but I have no citizenship here. Not while the core of my being is constantly under attack from mainstream culture.

As the world turns upside down what difference can I make? Do I take a stand for my beliefs? Do I stick my head above the parapet and make myself a target for people's accusations and anti-religious criticism? Do I challenge the acceptance of mainstream? I must. Otherwise the very essence of my being is nullified. No more the silent onlooker, the one who turns the other cheek. Stand for what is important or be trampled by the tidal wave of overbearing culture.